Doogie (June 8): So I finally found a few minutes to get in here. I’m not going to add reasoning to my picks because it’d a) be rubbing it in, and b) look like post hoc justifications. Nor will I try to defend that Rangers pick in round two with anything other than, “I was sick and wasn’t thinking.” So I’ll just add all the pretty history tables then peace out. Also, Gerard, you forgot that time Vancouver went to the Finals in 2011 despite your insistence that someone/something fuck them. Just sayin’.

Gerard (June 8): Nope. Take a look. I picked against Vancouver that year (and every other year) but I only started with “Fuck Vancouver. That’s why,” last season.

Doogie (June 9): Shit. You’re right. Objection withdrawn.

The big story coming out of the last round is the great success of “Because Fuck Vancouver, that’s why.” Perfect since its inception. Other than that, I’m awesome and Doogie still seems to think that the Rangers are an above-par team. I think Matt’s finally put away the dice.  So, without delay, here’s this round’s predictions!  I’m not going to do the typical Doogie thing of digging into teams’ pasts, because, well, I’m lazy.  But! Things will be up on time, and that’s got to count for something, right? Some justifications will likely be put into this over the next few days.

Doogie	Gerard	Matt	Result
4-2	4-3	4-2	4-3
4-2	4-0	4-1	4-3
4-2	4-1	4-2	4-1
4-3	4-2	4-3	4-1
2-2	3-1	3-1	W-L
11	10	10	GO
0	1	0	PS
9-3	10-2	9-3	W-L
24	19	24	GO
2	4	1	PS

In the interests of fairness, I’m going to retire “Because Fuck Vancouver. That’s why,” for the year since all three of the teams are in the final four. [Ed: (after game 1): I apparently really should have picked the Bruins to win though...]. The universe does not seem to hate Toronto as much as it does Vancouver (I know – it surprised me too), so that tag gets scrapped for next year.

And here come the picks.

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May 16: Matt just added his picks to our Google Doc. In they go.

Last round went pretty well, all things considered. Yeah, Montreal got nuked by injuries and a hot goalie, Boston required an historic third-period meltdown to avoid the dreaded 3-1 collapse, Pittsburgh only survived because the Islanders Pittsburghed it up themselves, and Vancouver managed to get swept in the most ironic way possible: taking too many penalties, failing to score, and screaming for Luongo to be put in net. But hey, all of us managed to do pretty well on our picks. Gerard’s clearly the big winner here.

Doogie	Gerard	Matt	Result
4-0	4-0	4-1	4-1
4-2	4-3	4-0	4-3
4-3	4-1	4-1	4-0
4-2	4-2	4-1	4-2
4-2	4-3	4-1	4-2
4-3	4-1	4-2	4-1
4-2	4-2	4-3	4-3
4-0	4-0	4-0	4-3
7-1	7-1	6-2	W-L
13	9	14	GO
2	3	1	PS

Since there’s no rest for the weary (and because the NHL would like to finish before Canada Day), round two begins the night after a pair of Game 7s. I’m tired and sick so this is going to be super fast and superficial. Enjoy?

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